Why I should be crowned ‘Queen of Baking Soda’

baking soda queen (aka BS Queen)

Dear Arm & Hammer,

You are baking soda.  I know of no other.  A household name and so well respected, your baking soda is a miracle.  No, really, I’m not exaggerating.  You improve my life every day!

How can I count the ways?

toothpaste

shampoo

bathroom scrubber

oven cleaner

an ingredient in my laundry detergent

skin exfoilent

drain cleaner

sucking bee venom (I’m allergic)

refrigerator deoderizor

extinguishes fires (I had first hand experience on this one!)

Oh, and let’s not forget cooking!

I don’t know what I would do without my hefty 14lb bag around.

As I go through my day so many other uses for your miracle (yup, I dared to say it) powder come to mind.  I thought I’d take the time to share a few with you…

How about sticking  it into toilet paper?  Dishes?  (the dish could disintegrate as it’s being washed and double as drain pipe cleaner!)?  Baking Soda  t-shirts so I’m fresh and clean everyday?  The ability to sprinkle some in my kids’ room and transform them into sparkling and clean sanctuaries.  How about great tasting satisfying low calorie deserts for after dinner?   Brakes for my car so I never have to replace them again?

I know!

The ability to sprinkle it in the gas tank to clean out the car from the inside (come on, it works in the laundry machine!).   Breath mints?   I’ll shill for you…  I’m not proud.  (You know I’ve got my own blog…)  I think there’s some real potential here.

No, no, no please.  Don’t misunderstand me again.  I am not here to bother you and your marketing experts.  I’m only offering a helping hand.  As I’ve expressed in previous correspondence and visits to your offices I just want to share my experiences with your amazing product.

Really, you can cancel that restraining order.

I promise I will not repeat my spontaneous interpretive dance in your halls.  You have to admit though it was a stroke of  genius on my part.  The movement, wall percussion, costume and lights just came together in a moment of spirited joy for the love of baking soda.  I do wish you had documented it better than just some crummy security camera, but I digress.

I love you and your product.  I am not a stalker,  just another devoted fan who likes to expound on how versatile and cheap your miracle powder is!  As a frugal girl I just can’t get over how this one product has replaced so many others on my shelf.  I used to have product love with many but now I’m faithful to only you.

Yes, I know distilled vinegar is important too.  It does not negate you in my mind, only chemically.  I would never combine the two of you!  I still shudder when I hear stories from the likes of Crunchy Betty when she would do this.  Really Betty, where is your sense of responsibility?!

I know there’s other girls like Penniless Parenting and Frugal Babe trying to claw their way up to my rightful crown but I’m here to say,

Please, please, please, please……please let it be me!  Crown me the QUEEN OF BAKING SODA!

You’ve got my digits-  I gave them to the nice man in the uniform who caught me skulking around your world headquarters.  I was just checking  in on my 20′ tall sculpture of baking soda made primarily of baking soda that I had left behind for you.

Anywho, give me a call!  I’m home most days!

Kisses,

Molly

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